Excuse the LOOONG break. It’s been super busy round here with school, and we’re all exhausted. Heaps has happened though, and Otis turns 1 on Sunday. Holy crap, how time has flown. I can’t believe it’s been a year since:
1. I’ve woken up naturally
2. I haven’t been tired
3. I was reading obsessively about homebirth (time well spent), not taking time to think about what would come next.
The weirdest thing is that I caught myself the other day surprised that I have a son – I was kind of thinking, “when I’m a mother I will…”
So a year ago I thought that when he was one, I’d wean Otis. I thought I’d have had enough, he’d have had enough, and it wouldn’t be too big of a deal. I had a big whinge to Thomas a couple of weeks ago though, because I was feeling entirely unready for it, and didn’t know when I’d ever feel ready, although at the same time I didn’t want to do real, proper extended breastfeeding. I thought, if I don’t wait until he self-weans, how will I know the time is right? Since I’ve been at school he’s not getting as much milk anyway, so is “asking” for it more, so it seemed that he’s really not ready for giving up either. And I do enjoy it. There is something incredibly joyful about snuggling together, seeing how he relaxes, and how I do too. It nearly made me cry the other day when I thought that I’d stop soon, and that he wouldn’t have any memory of it.
Then on Sunday I decided, “No more milk before breakfast”, which actually means, “I’m over waking up at 5 and breastfeeding on and off to try to keep Otis asleep until 7”, because I’m sure that the whole, Waking Up At Five O’Clock deal is intimately connected with bfing first thing in the morning. And Lo and Behold, the last couple of days he’s slept almost until 6 (haha, I know, it sounds pathetic, but it’s really quite a breakthrough round here). The most suprising thing has been that the entire week, he’s only had milk once after breakfast, because he just wasn’t asking for it the other days. Today, in fact, we were down to two feeds – an afternoon one because I was having a nap at the same time as Otis and wanted to lie in bed a bit longer, and once bedtime one; which he was too wired, post-bath, to be terribly interested in.
So it looks like we’re weaning, without even having decided to. And funnily enough, suddenly I’m ready for it.